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MEMORIES OF TURKEY 1. Where is the you, the me? Water flows over the stones. There is only the lovely light, nothing is separate. The village women know this-- the path of submission. The light fades as everyone eats from the same dish. The mind refuses to bend, to embrace this knowing. You will find questions and doubts and burnt fields and peace. Nothing matters but the light. All is love, no matter what dress you see it dancing in. 2. There is a certain ruthlessness to this path. Surrender to the knowledge that you do not learn but are taught. The teacher pours himself into your eyes. The heart drinks what the mind has already forgotten. 3. How can you burn when you don’t know what you burn for? You can only know the unknowable when you are beyond knowing. Efendi comes. I cry. Then I see a brittle shell with a sweet kernel inside. We must let go of letting go and willingly embrace the hard work of humility. All the banalities turn out to be true. 4. The shadows of the tomb whisper the words, “There is nothing here but you, there is nothing here but You.” We are the garden beneath which flows the river of Reality. We are the place where all connects to All. 5. Only when we are lost are we found in the You that is not us and not not Us. Every time I see the sun I am reminded of the blinding love that blots out all else and awakens me to Reality. Find the seed of light but do not go beyond your own limits as you reach for emptiness. Remember the zhikr Right foot, left foot. Remember all you can as you move beyond words. Go as quietly as you can. 6. The Heart is not in the Body. It is everywhere and also in the heart of the sheik. Dance before this shining mirror that shows you the beauty beyond separation. Through the physical vibration you move beyond the material into opening. This is the meaning of zhikr. 7. Efendi said, “Don’t speak from a place you don’t occupy.” Efendi said, “The longing is never satisfied but when you serve, the taste becomes sweet.” Efendi said, “The path takes a long time.” Efendi said, “When you are close to Allah, there is no place to rest your back.” Efendi said, “You must develop the inner and the outer equally. You must become pure in your heart, not just a master of words.” Efendi said, “Help an old man up four flights with groceries.” 8. Pretend you can barely speak until such time as you are able to speak with few words or none. Open your heart to the light and all else will follow. This is the path of Mevlana and Jesus and many others. Put your heart in front of the door and let everyone walk on it. Small flowers are hidden among the rocks along the way, not just at the summit. 9. The dervish and the flame dance always in the heart, whether it is asleep or awake. I do not wish for anything to be different. I wish only to remember gratitude and the gift of tears. Hu Efendim. Written after reading notes taken on a trip to Turkey for a six week stay with a Sufi community and its teacher.
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